This is the time of year when relationships appear to be at the forefront of our minds and actions. The holidays represent gatherings, sharing food and beverage, and warm wishes to all. This year I am saddened by the insurgence of violence in our society. I cannot remember a time when I had this unsafe feeling whether I at home, work or an event. Whatever happened to the phrase, “Be kind to one another;” or, “Love one another as you love yourself.” I am wishing all of you who read my blog to have a wonderful holiday season and be thankful for your family and friends. All these relationships should be cherished…my heart goes out to all of you.

Life teaches us many lessons. The most important is the relationships we make and retain. People come into our lives as our teachers, as we are also their teacher. We can learn from them, teach them and/or turn away from them. What is your path? I am a healer and find that those folks who come into my life are searching to be healed whether it’s the mind, body or spirit. What lessons can I teach them? More importantly, how can I help them? We are all looking for love and acceptance. Look at each of your blessings and be thankful daily for those blessings. The more positive we are, the more enlightened we become. Once we accept and love ourselves, only then can we love others unconditionally. And, this unconditional love is what we all seek. My heart goes out to all of you.

According to Wikipedia encyclopedia, Honesty is the human quality of communicating and acting truthfully related to truth as a value. This includes listening, and any action in the human repertoire, such as body language and tone used while speaking. The meaning of the word truth extends from honesty, good faith, and sincerity.
Honesty means simply stating facts and views as best one truly believes them to be. It includes both honesty to others, and to oneself and about one’s own motives and inner reality. Dishonesty, at times, has the ability to cause misfortune to the person who displayed it.
Isn’t it interesting that we judge ourselves by our intentions and judge others by their actions. Now go seize the day with truth and honesty!

One of my favorite authors, Ken Blanchard, wrote, “There is a difference between interest and commitment. When you’re interested in doing something, you do it only when it’s convenient. When you’re committed to something, you accept no excuses, only results.” What a profound concept. How many times in our lives do we say we are committed when we truly are not? If something that we wanted to happen did not happen, and we reexamine our motives and internal thoughts, we might find that we truly were definitely interested in the outcome, but truly not committed.

What do you do when life takes a turn that you don’t understand, nor are you happy about? What I find in life is that each of these turns helps us toward the spirituality we are craving…peace and harmony in our lives and the lives of those who surround us.
Here are six (6) activities each day that if you do, I promise that your life will gain some relevance and purpose once again.
1. Walk or exercise 30 minutes each day.
2. Each morning, state what your goal is for that day.
3. Make three (3) people smile today…yes, smile more and hug often.
4. Stay positive, in the present with energy, enthusiasm and empathy.
5. Talk to your family and friends often and send them messages that you are thinking of them.
6. Before bed, give thanks for…..whatever you succeeded in doing today.
And, if you don’t get all of these done today, that’s okay, too. Be kind to yourself. You are special just the way you are.

Just thinking about November 11th and what it means to me. The Veteran’s Day honors those who protect our freedom. Our freedom continues to come at a great expense…loss of our men and women in our Armed Forces. Our freedom as well as other countries that want a democracy continues to be threatened by those more interested in power and greed which permeates the world. If it were not for those in power wanting more, what would our society be like if we followed the Golden Rule, “Do unto others as you would have them do unto you.” Or, the Platinum Rule, “Do unto others as they would want done unto them.” To reach beyond our greed and power and reach out to others in need. What insight and value as well as respect we would have for others. And, in turn, our life would be much easier if others did treat us the way we want to be treated. On November 11th, honor our Armed Forces who give their lives to protect our freedom.

The best part of what I’m going to say is that you have a choice on how you react/respond to an emotional situation. Yes, people can only evoke reactions in us if we choose to let them. When you have an emotional reaction, by reflecting and going back in time to when you first remember a similar word, situation, person, or incident, you can work through the original incident by replacing those memories with what should have been to make you feel okay. Furthermore, by replacing these negative messages with positive ones, we overcome negative programming and become more in harmony with our relationships and our environment. As you begin to understand yourself more and more, you will respond positively to more and more situations and relationships with understanding and compassion. It’s worth a try…try it!

I just finished reading a book entitled, “Manifesting Change: It Couldn’t Be Easier,” by Mike Dooley. He talks about visualizing what you want. What an insightful and easy read book…I recommend it to all. What inspired me is that by visualizing the “end result,” you can then map out a plan to get there. In the Corporate World, this is considered a “Business Plan” where you have vision (where you want to be), goals (what you want to accomplish) and strategies (action steps of how to get you there). The Business Plan sounds so simple, yet so difficult when we are looking at our lives. Peter Senge talked about Personal Mastery many years ago that started with a vision. Folks who are successful and appear to have it all, have high levels of Personal Mastery which means that they have a vision and take baby steps or actions to work toward accomplishing that vision. So, I challenge each of you…what do you want and where do you want to be in one year? Two years? Five years? Now, make a plan of what you need to do to get you there.

What to do when life takes a turn that we don’t understand, nor are we happy about. What I find in life is that each of these turns helps us toward the spirituality we are craving…peace and harmony in our lives and the lives of those who surround us. I am thankful for the people in my life who have helped me through one of the roughest and most grievous turns in my life…the loss of my dear husband.
I have learned that by doing these six (6) activities each day, your life gains some relevance and purpose once again. I wanted to share with each of you…
1. Walk or exercise 30 minutes each day.
2. Each morning, state what your goal is for that day.
3. Make three (3) people smile today…yes, smile more and hug often.
4. Stay positive, in the present with energy, enthusiasm and empathy.
5. Talk to your family and friends often and send them messages that you are thinking of them.
6. Before bed, give thanks for…..whatever you succeeded in doing today.
And, if you don’t get all of these done today, that’s okay, too. Be kind to yourself. You are special just the way you are.

Do you ever wonder why you are so angry? What did the other person to trigger that anger? Was it something said or something not said? According to Wikipedia, “Anger is an emotion related to one’s psychological interpretation of having been offended, wronged, or denied. Often it indicates when one’s basic boundaries are violated.” When we have an emotional reaction to others, it usually stems from some issues we have within ourselves. As we begin our life, we are carefree and curious. As we grow, our family says, “No, you shouldn’t do or say that. No, don’t touch”. Then, we go to school, our teachers say, “No, that’s not right. You shouldn’t say that or you don’t do it that way.” All these negatives go into what I call a “toy box” so that you have it full of beliefs, biases and assumptions by the time you are an adult. Then, as an adult, you have an emotional reaction to what someone either says or does that offends you. If you could sit in a quiet room, close your eyes, and try to get in touch with this emotion the first time you remember ever feeling it, you will find that you can work through it by replacing that memory with a positive outcome. Once you change this negative into a positive, it will automatically be removed from your “toy box.” It takes a life time to remove all these “negatives” from your toy box. However, as you change the negative experiences to positive experiences, you will find that you are responding more positively toward others and having less emotional reactions. Remember, you are unique and special and deserve a positive and loving life..